Just another lazy day.

Cheerful "good morning" greetings, filter kaapi after brushing, THE HINDU ( I swear, it's a relief after reading the crappy Deccan Chronicle I used to get in Hyderabad), mom's suda suda soft idli's for breakfast followed by my all-time favorite fruit salad. Yes, I'm home! It doesn't matter that it's only for two days. I'm in chennai - my place, my area, my city. Hyderabad was lovely and the weather was just right almost all the time. In comparison, this place is humid, and if you go for a walk at 12 noon you'll probably come back with a hole through your head. But it's still my place, and I'm loving it. My beloved chaat-wala will be waiting for me outside Nilgiris, I never let him down when I come to chennai - his pani puri's lure me to his shop almost daily. It's not the best, and it's definitely not as big as the puri's I got at Dadu's, but it's definitely worth the 5 minute walk down to the place. And the best of it all, mom's cooking! I can almost smell the aroma of sweet nimbu rasam and vengaaya vethakozhambu with seppangazhangu fry :) Gawd, I love being here, and that's made me bunk two more exams. So that makes it six, if anybody is keeping count. And it also means I've to attend all six the next two mid-terms. Oh well, who cares, really? I loved the restaraunts and chaat shops in Hyderabad, people around me ensured that each time I went to a different place in a different part of the city. But now I'm going back to the good old Hotel Saravana Bhavan to meet a very unlikely friend. Anybody jealous? Please be. Those who know me will know I deserve this break. Long live Chennai! :)

Blank

Did I actually go to Hyderabad? My blog says so. A few mails in my inbox say I've met new people, photos in my laptop indicate that I've had a lot of fun, but was it all true? Did it actually happen, or was it just a bad dream? I say bad, because it's now over. All good things come to an end they say. Pah. Like they know how good some things are and how it just shouldn't end. They say life isn't fair. That you never get what you want? Then how come I got what I needed the most, though I myself wasn't sure of what I wanted? I don't believe in anything being perfect. Things always go wrong - that's the way it's meant to be, I say. But I think I've to change my opinion because the last two months have proved me wrong. It doesn't matter where I was in my life, it doesn't matter how bad a shape I was in when I went there, all I do know is that sometimes "it" just happens. I refrain from using the word because I don't believe in it, though as a kid I used to desperately hope it was true. Magic. That's the word I use to describe my stay in Hyderabad. Pure, rare, unadulterated magic.

I've been blank ever since I left lab two days back - clutching the NMR book that I got as a gift. It was a 45 minutes drive back to my relative's place, and that's what I was - blank. Throughout the journey. And that night. And the following morning. And on the flight back home. And now, only once I'm home, I'm able to think. It's all still a bit hazy but it's becoming clear now. What I was before I went there, and what I will be now that I'm going back to a place that has sworn to suck all the life out of me. Sigh. I'm going back to college, people. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE hostel life and I love my friends enough to say I'm waiting to see them. But you'll know what I'm talking about only if you're a part of what we are. Sid summed it up in the best possible way when we met. He said something close to this- "These two months made me feel like I was alive. Now we're going back to being zombies. ". That's the way it is, but it's the last year and we've now formed a group, you see. A group of zombies stuck in a place they don't understand - and this group has decided to help each other survive the inevitable proselytization of these pure souls to zombiness. Well, you get my point. If you don't, consider yourslef lucky that you don't belong to the same place that I do. That's that.

Anyway, this was supposed to be a tribute to my life in Hyderabad, but see what it's become - another bunch of sad lines about THE place. So let's stop it right here, shall we?

What did Hyderabad mean to me? Everything.

Why did I leave? Only because I had to.

Will I go back again? The minute I get another opportunity.

What will I do if I go there? Go to lab.

Oh and I cannot resist the temptation to crack the worsht PJ that just crossed my mind. If I'm blank, I should just subtract myself from all the readings that I get, right? I know you're all staring at the screen saying, eh? Was that a joke or what? No, that's a somewhat scientific joke and people in lab might probably *hi fi* over it. Sigh.

Call me crazy, that's who I am.

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

-Fix you, Coldplay

The Hyderabad chapter 2

Work : A well defined dream- hazy at times, but becoming clearer by the day.
Fun : A part of life. And work. Which makes it more fun.
Labmates : Exceptional - Much more than what I expected.
Climate : Romantic.
Romance : Non-existent, so don't raise your eyebrows. Not yet.
Passion : Newly discovered,mind you. Bikes.
Addiction: Caffiene. Cheese. Loads of it :)
Song : Iris.
Movie(s) : Before sunrise, Before sunset.
Food : Cadbury's temptations - Rum and raisins :)
Mood : Strawberry swing. Swinging wildly as ever.
Life : work.
What I want : A long bike ride in the rain.
What I get : A day-long baby sitting session. Two kids, all the more fun. No complaints :)
What I miss : Quality time with family. Beex.
Wishlist : An extention of stay in CCMB. Or rephrasing it, anything to keep me away from college. Anybody who can get me that will be promptly rewarded.
Biggest worry: Getting back to college.
Looking forward to : My last few weeks in CCMB. Meeting my friends when I get back to hostel. Why can't I go to hostel without going to college? WHY? :|
Overall rating : An all time high. 8 on 10. :)

The one?

You are the one I want to be with
When I'm feeling low or high
You are the one I want to hold onto
When I feel the need to fly

You are the only one I can talk to
with no restraints, with you I'm me
You make me happy with a hint of a smile
You make me want to be free

I want to protect you
from the evils in the world
Your face, so calm and serene
a sight that is now seldom seen

So pure is your heart
untouched by the woes of hurt
I want to hold you close and tell you
that like you, there are very few

No complications,no twisted words
with inner meaning, no lies.
So simple life seems with you
When you're around time flies.

What makes you the only one
who knows how to make me laugh?
Who will make me face life again
If not for you? I ask.

Your careless gesture
A cry for affection
Your tiny little fingers
Holding on, not letting go.

What more do I want?
Just this. For you to know,
that
I love you more than I can show.

Dedicated to my brother's 2 year old son.

Yet another sad set of lines. Sigh. This should stop

Life thrown away
a world that refuses to show the way

Tears held back
how many times? can't keep track

Jokes to avoid reality
while wallowing in self pity

Music hurts
ideas get blurred

A smile to a friend
it's so easy to pretend

Mind-%$#^ed
and running out of luck

A happy song
a need to belong

Days pass by
seems like years, don't know why

A phone conversation
solace,mind on vacation

A long bike ride
just the wind,nothing to hide

The rain on my face
thoughts can you erase?

legs itching to dance
but mind still in a trance

An empty stare
all beyond repair?

The Hyderabad chapter 1

I landed in hyderabad a couple of days back, and I took a flight after a really really long time, and to make it short, it was an exhilarating experience. For the first time, I could actually feel the change in pressure in my ears and appreciate the beauty of the Eustachian tube. Anyway, I started work the next day. Not WORK work, but those who know me will know that, so yeah, I like calling it work, cuz I'm paid for it! :) The whole environment is so serene and sanctimonious. Everybody's religion seems to be the result they're waiting for, the excitement in waiting to find out if what they theorized was true. And for someone for whom practical experience has been questionable till now, just seeing all those labs and people actually doing some important work is an experience by itself. That's pretty much what I've been doing the two days I was at work. Reading, learning, clearing doubts with knowledgable people, people whom I thought would be at a level where they wouldn't tolerate stupid questions from someone like me. It's amazing, the way everybody gels in a lab as big as the one I'm in. I actually went for lunch with two senior scientists and one junior scientist on my first day. I still can't believe how casual the whole thing was. Well, I now lunch with a different group, but the first day experience is something that's still not sunk in, and one I'll cherish for a long long time. The PhD and postdoc students are very friendly, all ready to help me out whenever they get the time. It's been amazing so far, and I hope it remains like this throughout. I don't know if I'm going to be doing what they're doing now in a few years, but I do know that these two months will probably help me decide. probably. sigh. Well, drastic mood change. So that's it for this post!